HIV Discordant Coupling

http://aidssupport.aarogya.com/index.php

Dear FORUM,

Re: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AIDS-INDIA/message/11428

At Bharti Derma Care Center, Amritsar, I have quite a few such examples--

1.L, an HIV widow married his brother's HIV negative servant after n number of counseling sessions for both four years ago--following the counseled way of protection,they are as happy as any other four year married couple. Waiting for the success of science to eliminate virus from wife,M ,is not spoiling his today--they are both enjoying it.

2. V, married his fiancée without informing his own HIV status, when
compelled to have a baby after one year, he followed the route of assisted reproduction and is a father of HIV negative son today. Today the wife also knows his status but is content with one son and happy to be in his company without asking for more.

3. This lady medical representative divorced by first husband was forced by an HIV positive person on grounds of love to marry--no amount of counsel could deter them from their determination to be one and today in first year of their married life,they are a happy couple.

4. This dental surgeon (lady) was accepted by her veterinary surgeon
bridegroom despite her HIV status, the couple moved to Canada, has a HIV positive daughter and a HIV negative son after seven years or so of marriage. The husband is still negative.

5. R,the lady lecturer became a HIV widow with a HIV positive son. One of her widower relation married her,so that he and his three sons do not die of hunger and she gets a place to live/die on the condition that HIV positive son will not come to live with the new family. The son is taken care off by maternal grand parents and the couple is into sixth year of their marriage.

I can go on narrating more real life stories, but the question raised by Mr. Shaligram remains unanswered till we look at the whole situation from various angles.

We have to understand why some one wants to marry--the institution of
marriage-- There can be no quick fix solutions to human problems surrounded by diseases like HIV--the answers ought to be custom made.

Every situation has different angle and we have to understand all the
angles.

Our experience clearly tells us that despite isolation of worst nature in cases of leprosy, we have seen lepers marrying each other after being abandoned by the society. I am of firm belief that we should not allow today's HIV victims become like lepers of tomorrow--we have to learn from past.

Marriage is good, should be allowed--but not child marriage(as in the case presented by Mr.Shaligram) only after fullest counselling and ensuring happiness of future,ensuring that misery will stop surrounding such needy persons(today n number of HIV people approach us for finding partners, success of positivesaathi.com is a proof).

We must accept the challenges thrown after the survival of HIV disease and will have to look beyond just saving lives or preventing death--we have to give them life--scientists will have to work hard in this direction.

Dr.Rakesh Bharti,
Amritsar
--
Rakesh Bharti MD, AAHIVS,
BDC Research center,
27-D,Sant Avenue,The Mall, Amritsar.
Punjab,INDIA143001.
TEl-91-183-2277822;91-183-2278522
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